Baby is no fool: no sooner is it out in the world, breathing dank British air, than it starts to get peckish. Fortunately there are two readily available sources of nourishment to hand. Clamping baby to the mother's breast within an hour of birth increases the chance that baby will eventually breastfeed successfully. Some babies take to the breast immediately, and the milk gushes out, in which case, great. Other mothers and/or babies find it all the most terrible struggle. None of this has much to do with you, the father. This is when some men start to feel excluded from things, when the unbreachable bond between mother and baby first forms. But breastfeeding is a good thing, even for the cast-aside dad. Encourage it at all costs. Here's why.
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| How To Breastfeed A Baby For The First Time |
Breast milk, as we will come to know and sniff and even taste it, does not kick in until three or four days after the birth. Baby's first feed will be a substance called colostrum, a sort of milky hors d'oeuvre high in protein and stuffed with important antibodies that will protect baby from infections and boost the immune system. Having watched two babies grow to toddlerhood on breast milk, I have come to believe that breastfeeding is, in its way, even more miraculous than the birth process.
Everything baby needs in its first six months is in those two mighty mounds. It's psychologically healthy for the baby, and also for the mother: endorphins start to flow as she feeds, relaxing her and even cheering her up, if she needs cheering. The milk is easy to digest; it's always there; it's the right temperature; it's sterile; it's full of minerals and vitamins and other good things. Breastfeeding helps burn off the mother's exciting new fat reserves. Babies have fewer nappy rashes and their shit doesn't smell as bad. And best of all? No bottle feeds for Daddy in the middle of the night. Hallelujah and praise the Lord: this is indeed a miracle. But more of this later.
Hair. Some babies are bald. Some have a shock of hair. Premature babies sometimes have downy body hair called lanugo, which can be a different sort of shock. immediate response: have we given birth to a chimp? But it falls out quickly, as it would have done in the womb if the baby had gone to full term. (Lanugo literally means 'wool', and is also the technical term for the fuzz on a peach.) The head hair should also fall out in the first three months and may grow back in a colour. Not unlike Sir Elton John's.
Skull. At birth the baby's head may seem disproportionately large. (In fact it's the eyes that are disproportionately largest, and will have to grow the least between now and adulthood.) Slightly more disturbingly, the skull bones will be soft, which is how the head can change shape during birth and in the immediate aftermath.
The skullbones won't fuse completely for several months. In the meantime there's a soft spot on top popularly known as the fontanelle (which is actually the name of the membrane that covers it). It's roughly diamond shaped, and you should be able to see a pulse beating there. Nothing more vividly represents the absolute vulnerability of the newborn.
Genitals. Are they vast and a bit purple? If so, it's nothing to do with you. Pregnancy hormones, not genetics, make them that way. They will revert to normal size within a few days. But take a few photos first to impress gullible non-parents. To find out more, you can check out How To Breastfeed A Baby For The First Time.